Tuesday, May 22, 2012

Brave Girls Club

A friend forwarded me some posts from a great blog called Brave Girls Club.  I appreciate the encouragement along the way...it seems like people know exactly when I need some TLC the most.  I started getting the daily emails from the Brave Girls Club and, wow, do some of them really hit home.  I suggest you check it out.

Busy, and feeling a bit numb

I figured I better get a post up, even if it's just to explain why I haven't been writing much.  We've been super busy, my parents recently got back to Minnesota and we've been enjoying lots of time with them in addition to our normal schedule.  And, I've been feeling a bit numb by everything lately.  Disappointed that our dreams still haven't come true, wondering if they will and how, thinking about all the options and decisions ahead and not sure where we'll land.  I want the happy ending.  The cute chubby baby, the proud big brother, the relief of knowing that we don't have the pressure and challenge of trying to grow our family.....just the challenge of raising our family.  A miracle.

I do have lots of posts floating around my head that will get written down some day, when I have "free time"!

In the mean time, I'm living the profile.  Or, at least doing the best I can to live the profile.

Wednesday, May 9, 2012

Adoptive Parents, They Stick Together

I honestly can't believe how many emails we've received from adoptive parents that saw our story on WCCO or through a post on Facebook.  We received so much encouragement from them...families shared their struggles and poured their hearts out in these emails, I received links to their blogs and photos of their families.  Some even commented that they don't share some of this information with their friends.  I decided that adoptive parents are kindred spirits, they root for one another, support one another and have a special bond.  I am hopeful and feel very blessed that someday I will get to officially join the adoptive parent club.

I have several friend (some new and some that I have known for years) that have adopted and they've been amazing resources to me.  I've called some at the height of stress and they always calm my nerves, listen and understand.

I've also been fortunate to be in contact with some women that are patiently waiting to grow their families through adoption.  I spent quite a bit of time chatting online with one the other night, it was so great to connect and share our stories....it made me feel so normal.  (If that is even possible!!)  :)

Tonight I read through and responded to a few of the adoptive parents that recently emailed us.  I feel uplifted and hopeful.

A few comments that really stood out:

The only time adoption does not work is when you give up. Never give up as you just do not know when you will find your child.

To say we're overjoyed at what God has given us -- the opportunity to experience a birth and pregnancy AND adoption -- doesn't begin to describe our emotions.

I hope this offers even more support and bursts open your heart with joy and anticipation at what God has in store for you and your family. 

I'm thankful for these connections.

A Lesson from a Fish

Tonight Griffin and I were fishing off the dock at my parent's home and I caught a fish.  I yelled for Jamie to help.  I decided I better not try to take the fish off the hook myself....I certainly had no clue how to take a fish off a hook and didn't want to do any trial and error in front of Griffin.  I kept the fish in the water so it could breathe until Jamie got to us.  Right when Jamie got next to me on the dock the fish got unhooked and swam away.

It reminded me of everything that we are going through right now--I'm stressed, I keep working through the options, I keep getting help and support from others.....and in the end, just like the fish, I am sure it will all work itself out.

I think God sent the fish my way.  Yes, I was paying attention.

And, Then it's Over

On Sunday Jamie came home from his weekend away.  We talked about how blessed we were to get so much support and how therapeutic it was to share our story.  We truly hope that it helped or inspired someone (and based on the many responses we saw, I think it did).

But, there is a part that is hard.  See, we know we are "closer" to bringing our baby home, but we're still not there.  The segment aired and although things changed, they stayed the same.  A baby didn't show up on our doorstep, and isn't going to.  It's still going to be a hard road ahead.  We have to match.  We have to wait for our baby to be born.  We have to hope that the baby's biological parents don't change their mind.  It's going to be hard, worth it, but hard.

I felt like this was the end of our story being shared.  I considered asking some friends if they'd be willing to share our story on their Facebook pages, but I hate to be obnoxious and keep asking people to "market" us.  What's happened over the last few days shocked me!

I didn't need to ask people to share our page.  They did, many, many people did without me asking.  People I hadn't seen since high school and college.  People I barely knew but was friends with on Facebook.  People I didn't know at all! One one friend's page I saw that it was shared 8 times from her post, I clicked to see who shared it and I didn't know them.

Here were a few of the many posts that accompanied the link to our story:

Hey FB world! This is a story of love and hope for a dear friend of mine from Willmar/Spicer MN. It is my prayer that God can bless the channels of social media and help them in sharing the hearts and home with a baby in need of a Christian home. Please pray for the Heather Wolney Thompson family for us as well!

I can't help but share this story of one of my dearest friends. Heather Wolney Thompson and Jamie have a dream of growing their family but have been faced with many challenges along the way. Their story has been a hard one. A sad one. But also - Inspiring. They continue to have such an amazing attitude and hope, even through the devastating times. Their story and the reaction they are getting from friends, acquaintances and complete strangers is a reminder of all the good there is in this world. Something we too often lose sight of. Heather and Jamie, thanks for sharing your story... You are offering support and encouragement to so many others that are facing the same hardships.

Heather and I attended High School in MN together. Please take a moment and watch this video (especially if you have or love kids or starting a family). So touching. They also have a Facebook page "like" and share this. Support brings you a long way. Love you Heather! Good luck to you and your beautiful family.

Show your Mud Butt (posted on the Mud Butt Cloth Diaper Facebook page) support for an awesome fan, friend, and fellow adoptive family! Check out their awesome story that aired last Friday night. Let's spread the word! They are a great family:)

A wonderful couple who truly are as good as they sound. Please share their story.

I checked our adoption Facebook page just now and we have 470 likes.  I realize not everyone is going to go ahead and like a total stranger's Facebook page, so I think 470 is terrific!  Totally amazing.  

Support Rolling In

I was totally shocked about the support that came in through Facebook the night the story aired.  WCCO added a link to their website so that people could find our adoption Facebook page, I didn't expect that many people would track it down, but they did!  Before the story aired the page had 307 "likes".  By Monday morning we had 121 additional "likes", many from people we didn't know.  We received many emails and posts from families that suffered miscarriages, adopted children, had children many years apart, and even one person who was adopted--he thanked us for choosing open adoption.  I wanted to follow up with each person personally, and still have quite a few to respond to.

Here were some comments from complete strangers.  Amazing....

"Just saw your story on WCCO and had tears running down our cheeks."

"I just saw you guys on TV.  You were so calm (impressive).  Prayers continue that the right people/person also saw it."

"Just saw your story on WCCO and hope and pray that your family finds what it is looking for!  Bless you all for being so open and willing to do whatever is needed to improve the life of a child as your family grows.  Bless you all..."

"Tons of prayers coming your way on this journey."

It was so incredibly uplifting.  I honestly could feel the prayers of many lifting us up during our journey.

We also received one email from someone that wanted to meet with us.  At this point, we don't see that going anywhere, but it's encouraging that someone saw us and thought that we would make good parents for their child.  I felt so calm about it and told Jamie that I felt a lot of peace...since we had so many more people praying for us, I was certain the right thing would work out!

Our Story

Here's a link to the story that aired about us on WCCO.  We're so blessed to have John, David and the WCCO team help us share our story.  And, for Michelle Turnberg for calling John about our story.  AND, our sister-in-law for sharing our adoption page on Facebook, which is how Michelle heard about it!

Tuesday, May 8, 2012

Watching our Story

Jamie was out of town on Friday night; I was thrilled that my parents were back from Florida so that I could watch the interview with them.  My mom made a yummy dinner and although their lake place isn't where I grew up, it really does feel like home.  My dad recorded the 6:00 news and a friend tipped me off that one of the promotional pieces played then, we found it and watched it several times. It was surreal.  All of this is surreal!  In the piece, I was talking about how difficult our third miscarriage was, but how we received so much support.  It was true, and it seemed like the perfect 5 second clip to describe our journey.

We all piled on the couch and I did one of the things I do best, I fell asleep.  My parents woke me up just before the 10 o'clock news was about to start. I missed the popcorn party.  I started recording Griffin watching it, then put down my camera and soaked it all up.  I knew that lots of our friends and family were huddled around their TVs watching and supporting us.  I got choked up watching it, it was truly beautiful.  They did an amazing job of telling our story in a heartfelt, genuine way.  I couldn't have asked for anything better. It was longer than I expected and better than I expected. And, I have high expectations.  My parents were great people to watch it with--they were so positive and were happy with how the story was told.  Griffin turned to me ans asked, "Is that really what happened?" I am sure he was wondering where the rest of it was, the parts that were edited out.

Texts were coming through my phone like crazy, my phone quickly filled up and I couldn't get any more texts.  Jamie called. He was happy with the story, too.  He talked to Griffin. Griffin told him that he was on TV, too!

Here were some of the text messages that came in:

I am crying and can't stop.  It was great. Love you.

Great story on WCCO!

A and H are tracking how fast the likes go up on your adoption page!  :)

What an awesome story we just watched!  So proud of you guys for doing that.  Blessings and prayers to you!

It was an awesome story.....had tears with you!

What a great story! Griffin did such a great job, too!

Great piece on WCCO!

Just saw the news.  Makes me happy and sad.  Hope you get a good response!

That was beautiful!  I am bawling with a great big smile!:)  It hurts all over again, but there is so much hope!

We saw it!  It was great!

Loved it!  <3

Here's our little man watching himself on TV:

The Post Interview Wait

From my previous post, you know that we felt really good about our interview with WCCO. John and David made us feel really comfortable and it felt therapeutic to share our story.  We both felt in our hearts that it was the right thing to do, maybe it would speak to someone that needed to hear about another family that were making the best of a tough situation.

We thought the interview would play the weekend after it was recorded, and knew that they would call us when they knew it would air.  It didn't play that weekend, but the following Wednesday Jamie received a text from John telling us that it would air on Friday night at 10:00 p.m. WE found out at the perfect time, we were on our way to a family bridal shower so when people asked about when it would air, we could actually tell them!

Friday was interesting, it's definitely hard to focus when you know you are going to be on TV that evening.  I ran into quite a few people, received quite a few Facebook posts and received lots of emails from people that saw the promotional "ad" on WCCO.  I gathered as much info as I could about it so I could be prepared!  People claimed it sounded good, so I did my best to believe them!  And, you know lots of your friends and family will be watching. And, you have no idea what parts of the one hour interview will air. What will the spin on the story be?  More than anything, I just wanted it to be genuine, just us sharing our struggles and our hope. It's so very personal, yet we felt compelled to share it.

When I felt nervous, I reminded myself of the other hopeful adoptive parents that wish they had an opportunity like this.  It's really such a blessing.

All of that Time

Today I was at a Partner meeting for work.  One of the Partners mentioned goals....investing time achieving goals and becoming an expert.  I started to think about the countless hours I spent in OB/GYN waiting rooms, getting ultrasounds, online researching infertility, blogging about wanting more children, crying, going to infertility support group meetings, driving to appointments, filling out paperwork, talking to adoptive parents.  It overwhelmed me.  I thought about what I could have done in that time.  Become an expert in something, anything.  Learned to sew?  Became really good at photography?  Started a side business?  Got another degree?  I used that time to try to grow my family and some days it feels like wasted time.

But, I have to remember, it only feels like it was "wasted" time....it wasn't wasted.  Each step of the process has brought us closer to growing our family.  It's made us stronger, more appreciative and helped us to have the best marriage we can.  It's allowed me to find healthy ways to cope with stress and to "to sweat the small stuff".      And, I have to see this journey as serving a greater purpose, not only to add to our family, but hopefully to give hope to others.

I have to admit, for a while I sat and wondered what my career would be like if all of the time I spent growing our family had been devoted to work.  Oh well, I have lots of great knowledge about egg production, ovulation and fertility drugs.

A Brother

This morning I was brushing Griffin's hair and I gave him a kiss.  I said, "You know that some day another girl is going to love you soooo much."  And he replied with, "But, mom, I want a brother."  I guess he has babies on the brain just like me.

Griffin's Fortune

Griffin received this fortune the other night. I read it an thought, "Big brother, perhaps?"  Now that would be an honor.

Sunday, May 6, 2012


I plan to blog my heart out on Wednesday.  Lots on my heart and in my brain!  We feel blessed beyond measure, the support we've received from the interview on WCCO has been amazing.

No, we still don't have a baby.

For those of you that didn't see my blitz all over Facebook, or didn't catch the news on Friday night at 10:00 p.m., here it is: http://minnesota.cbslocal.com/2012/05/04/after-4-miscarriages-minn-family-turns-to-an-open-adoption/

They did a beautiful job of capturing the true us.  I am so thankful for the opportunity to share our story.  I hope that it was not only therapeutic for us, but for others that have suffered through infertility as well.

Wednesday, May 2, 2012

Interview Scheduled to Air!

John, the reporter that interviewed us, contacted us today to tell us that our interview is scheduled to air on WCCO this Friday evening on the 10:00 p.m news.  He said that the piece turned out great.  They will be promoting it prior to airing it.  I am not looking forward to seeing myself on TV, but can't wait to see Griffin!  It will be fun to see his reaction when he sees himself on TV!  The interview will also be on WCCO's website after it airs.  We found out tonight that it may also air on a Fargo station on Saturday.  I'll keep you posted!  We really hope that it impacts someone (or someones) positively!!

Tuesday, May 1, 2012

Still Waiting....

I think I could have lots of posts titled as above, and after talking to other adoptive mothers, it sounds like it might be like that forever!  :)

We were contacted by the reporter that came to our home, he said that the story is edited and he expects it to play in the next few days.  He said we'll be contacted when they know when it will air.  So, we're waiting to find out, and answering lots of questions about when it will air!