Here we go again....

So our second (and last) adoption fund garage sale is underway!  We've had a ton of generous donations from people and really appreciate the support.  We have had lots of friends give their time and items to help out.  It was going to be a one day sale (a friend's neighborhood has a big sale every year, so we thought we'd take advantage of the traffic).  It was raining this morning, but good old weather.com {that I will never trust again} said that the storms would blow over.  So, we set the monsterous sale up--we had a few people show up, but also had lots of dark strom clouds loom over us.  After the ginormous rack of women's clothing fell over, we decided we were doomed.  So, we brought everything in and worked on pricing the items that were added to the sale this morning.  Then MORE people showed up--meaning more than we had when it wasn't raining.  No one could barely move in the garage, but people dug through stuff anyway!  We'd be ready to shut the garage door, then someone else would arrive.  We ended up with about $140 in sales, not too bad for not even being open!  On top of it we sold a nice patio set via phone for $150, so we had close to a $300 garage-sale-not-open-day!  I'm hoping for no rain tomorrow and a successful sale!  Then everything will get boxed up and sent to The Link (thrift store in New London that a United Way group I am involved in helped make over) and my daycare provider's sale (we recently found out that her daughter is raising money to send care packages to the troops).  Thank goodness we have had a ton of help because garage sales are exhausting!

Wednesday night set up went smoothly thanks to these ladies!!

Barb checking out the shoe selection!

 While loading up items that we priced for the garage sale, this was sitting on our table...it made me smile....

Like it?  It can be yours for $3!  Or maybe $2?  All of the prices are running together in my head!

Jean helping to hang things after the nasty Friday morning weather!

Jen laughing after we dragged everything in, that's about all we could do at that point! 

Check out all of the clothes behind her!!

1st Home Study Meeting

Our 1st home study meeting went great!  We met our social worker at her office in St. Cloud and spent 3 hours visiting with her.  She is wonderful--positive, easy to talk to, and offered us lots of helpful insight.  She is adopted, which is what prompted her to go into the profession.  It was interesting to hear her story, she found out she was adopted when she was about 7. 

She talked to us about the waiting list right away, it's much longer than it's been in a while--17 families are waiting to get into the profile book of 60 families.  The families that we met during our training in April are approved and ready for adoption but, we are about 2 months behind due to our most recent miscarriage.  She recommended doing some outreach, if we are able to be connected to a birth mother without going in the profile book, this could expedite the process and save us $5,000.  But, it will be worth the wait! 

She asked us lots of questions, but the meeting felt much more like a conversation than an interview.  It was actually quite fun and easy, we talked to her about growing up, school, how we met and our favorite topic, Griffin.  She asked some "deep" questions--how do we cope with grief and loss, what types of support systems do we have in place, how do we make decisions when we don't agree, etc. 

The second part of our home study will be at our home, most likely a week from Friday (due to the state shutdown a course she was planning to teach is cancelled).  She needs to see our home to make sure that we have room for another child and that it's safe.  We have another section of questions to answer regarding our family life and it will be helpful to have Griffin involved in that piece.  I can't wait to have her meet him!

We are excited for our next steps...thanks for the support and for joining us on this journey! 

All set to meet our social worker

Tomorrow is the day we have been looking forward to for a long time--we are meeting our adoption social worker at her office in St. Cloud to begin our home study!  It's so refreshing to not feel nervous like I did when I went to the doctor--I was concerned that my body wasn't going to respond how it should and, of course, the ultrasound appointments after we found out we were pregnant were nerve wracking.  All we have to do tomorrow is be ourselves.  So easy.  Now if I could just stay this calm throughout the whole process....good luck with that!

Due Date

As July approached and the days passed, in the back of my mind I kept thinking about the "would've beens".  If I were still pregnant I would've been.... But, it's just that, it's the would've been, not the AM.  On the day of my projected due date I was looking through some papers to find a card, and found photos that my good friend Mandi took of me when I was pregnant in January: 13 weeks, 5 days.  My IVF cycle lead to Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome (OHSS), so my belly was already popping out.  I loved it.  Mandi came to visit and to take pictures of Griffin.  Jamie was out of town, and we thought it would be cute to have some belly shots taken to surprise him with.  Jamie and I had both waited for this pregnancy for a long time and fought hard to get it.  Mandi took some great photos.  Two days later I found out that our baby had died.

About two weeks later, a good friend sent me a book called Naming The Child, a wonderful book that was just what I needed at the time.  I got to an interesting part of the book where the author suggested that if you knew you were going to miscarry or have a stillbirth, to have belly photos taken--it may be one of the only photos you have of your baby.  I felt comforted knowing that Mandi gave me an incredible gift by taking those photos.  A few weeks later, she sent me copies.  She knew I wanted them, but I couldn't get myself to order them.  Again, an amazing gift.  So, on my due date, I ran across them and paused to think about our little boy that didn't make it, and the hope we still have for growing our family.

January 8, 2011

The Good: Our Anniversary

This might sound pretty pathetic, but last year I had a hard time celebrating our anniversary.  What makes it so pathetic is that I'm truly blessed to be married to him.  Here's the deal, when I walked down the aisle to him I had a vision in my head of what was to come.  Get married, have several children, drive them to soccer games and love the chaos.  It obviously didn't work that way.  Instead, about a year ago we were signing paperwork and great big checks to start IVF.  Not what I imagined life to bring us.  I knew life wasn't always going to be easy, but I certainly didn't expect the challenges to come so soon after getting married!   And, for it to involve something that I always assumed was going to be easy.  So, last year on our anniversary we went to a movie.  I didn't want to go to dinner, I was afraid I would start crying. 
This year has been more challenging than I could have imagined.  Yet, yet we are still happily married.  I've heard of many couples not getting through this, not agreeing on what to do next, if they should pursue more children or not, how much money is too much to spend.  And, we're on the same page.  Some times it's taken a while, but we get there. 
So, this year, I want to CELEBRATE!  Celebrate that our marriage has been through a lot, but we are still so happy together.  Part of me feels like we shouldn't go too crazy and should save any extra money we have for our adoption.  But, I also know it's important for us to take time for each other.  We'll be better parents for it.  So, we are thinking of a night or two away in Red Wing.  We'll see what we come up with!  And, I might start crying at dinner, but that's only because I know I am blessed beyond belief to be married to someone who has been so nurturing, kind, supportive and thoughtful during this struggle.  And, he's right by my side, fighting along with me.