Support Group

In January of 2010 I couldn't take it anymore, I needed to talk to other people like me.  Infertile people.  I needed to know my feelings weren't crazy, I wanted to be validated.  I joined a Resolve support group and it's been good for me.  I've met great women battling what I've been battling for years.  Most of them have been battling for years, too.

I attended the meeting last week, and it dawned on me that everyone that I started the group with has "resolved" their infertility in one way or another: adoption, birth or getting their arms around the idea that more children aren't in their future.  But not me, I'm still there.  Chugging along.  I'm suppose I'm making progress, it just doesn't feel like it.

I started reflecting on the money (close to $45,000), the time (over 3.5 years), the miscarriages (4), the failed IUIs (5), the months on infertility medication (12), the months waiting in the book (7), the tears (countless).  Still no resolution.  It made me sad.  I'm kinda "the last one standing."  Then I remembered the wonderful women I met that are happily holding their babies.  I am so grateful for that.  Someday I will get to join them (at least I keep telling myself that).

It's shocking.  I would have never guessed I'd still be going to meetings, unresolved.  I was SO positive that each next step was going to work.  I never would have guessed that I'd be the last one of the group standing.  But, here I am hoping that soon my only reason to attend meetings will be to support other women like me and tell them not to give up.  I've fought harder than I thought I could, experienced more disappointment than I thought I could endure, but I'm OK.  Truly OK.

Adoptive Parents, They Stick Together

I honestly can't believe how many emails we've received from adoptive parents that saw our story on WCCO or through a post on Facebook.  We received so much encouragement from them...families shared their struggles and poured their hearts out in these emails, I received links to their blogs and photos of their families.  Some even commented that they don't share some of this information with their friends.  I decided that adoptive parents are kindred spirits, they root for one another, support one another and have a special bond.  I am hopeful and feel very blessed that someday I will get to officially join the adoptive parent club.

I have several friend (some new and some that I have known for years) that have adopted and they've been amazing resources to me.  I've called some at the height of stress and they always calm my nerves, listen and understand.

I've also been fortunate to be in contact with some women that are patiently waiting to grow their families through adoption.  I spent quite a bit of time chatting online with one the other night, it was so great to connect and share our stories....it made me feel so normal.  (If that is even possible!!)  :)

Tonight I read through and responded to a few of the adoptive parents that recently emailed us.  I feel uplifted and hopeful.

A few comments that really stood out:

The only time adoption does not work is when you give up. Never give up as you just do not know when you will find your child.


To say we're overjoyed at what God has given us -- the opportunity to experience a birth and pregnancy AND adoption -- doesn't begin to describe our emotions.


I hope this offers even more support and bursts open your heart with joy and anticipation at what God has in store for you and your family. 





I'm thankful for these connections.

And, Then it's Over

On Sunday Jamie came home from his weekend away.  We talked about how blessed we were to get so much support and how therapeutic it was to share our story.  We truly hope that it helped or inspired someone (and based on the many responses we saw, I think it did).

But, there is a part that is hard.  See, we know we are "closer" to bringing our baby home, but we're still not there.  The segment aired and although things changed, they stayed the same.  A baby didn't show up on our doorstep, and isn't going to.  It's still going to be a hard road ahead.  We have to match.  We have to wait for our baby to be born.  We have to hope that the baby's biological parents don't change their mind.  It's going to be hard, worth it, but hard.

I felt like this was the end of our story being shared.  I considered asking some friends if they'd be willing to share our story on their Facebook pages, but I hate to be obnoxious and keep asking people to "market" us.  What's happened over the last few days shocked me!

I didn't need to ask people to share our page.  They did, many, many people did without me asking.  People I hadn't seen since high school and college.  People I barely knew but was friends with on Facebook.  People I didn't know at all! One one friend's page I saw that it was shared 8 times from her post, I clicked to see who shared it and I didn't know them.

Here were a few of the many posts that accompanied the link to our story:

Hey FB world! This is a story of love and hope for a dear friend of mine from Willmar/Spicer MN. It is my prayer that God can bless the channels of social media and help them in sharing the hearts and home with a baby in need of a Christian home. Please pray for the Heather Wolney Thompson family for us as well!


I can't help but share this story of one of my dearest friends. Heather Wolney Thompson and Jamie have a dream of growing their family but have been faced with many challenges along the way. Their story has been a hard one. A sad one. But also - Inspiring. They continue to have such an amazing attitude and hope, even through the devastating times. Their story and the reaction they are getting from friends, acquaintances and complete strangers is a reminder of all the good there is in this world. Something we too often lose sight of. Heather and Jamie, thanks for sharing your story... You are offering support and encouragement to so many others that are facing the same hardships.


Heather and I attended High School in MN together. Please take a moment and watch this video (especially if you have or love kids or starting a family). So touching. They also have a Facebook page "like" and share this. Support brings you a long way. Love you Heather! Good luck to you and your beautiful family.


Show your Mud Butt (posted on the Mud Butt Cloth Diaper Facebook page) support for an awesome fan, friend, and fellow adoptive family! Check out their awesome story that aired last Friday night. Let's spread the word! They are a great family:)


A wonderful couple who truly are as good as they sound. Please share their story.

I checked our adoption Facebook page just now and we have 470 likes.  I realize not everyone is going to go ahead and like a total stranger's Facebook page, so I think 470 is terrific!  Totally amazing.  

Support Rolling In

I was totally shocked about the support that came in through Facebook the night the story aired.  WCCO added a link to their website so that people could find our adoption Facebook page, I didn't expect that many people would track it down, but they did!  Before the story aired the page had 307 "likes".  By Monday morning we had 121 additional "likes", many from people we didn't know.  We received many emails and posts from families that suffered miscarriages, adopted children, had children many years apart, and even one person who was adopted--he thanked us for choosing open adoption.  I wanted to follow up with each person personally, and still have quite a few to respond to.

Here were some comments from complete strangers.  Amazing....

"Just saw your story on WCCO and had tears running down our cheeks."

"I just saw you guys on TV.  You were so calm (impressive).  Prayers continue that the right people/person also saw it."

"Just saw your story on WCCO and hope and pray that your family finds what it is looking for!  Bless you all for being so open and willing to do whatever is needed to improve the life of a child as your family grows.  Bless you all..."

"Tons of prayers coming your way on this journey."

It was so incredibly uplifting.  I honestly could feel the prayers of many lifting us up during our journey.

We also received one email from someone that wanted to meet with us.  At this point, we don't see that going anywhere, but it's encouraging that someone saw us and thought that we would make good parents for their child.  I felt so calm about it and told Jamie that I felt a lot of peace...since we had so many more people praying for us, I was certain the right thing would work out!

Watching our Story

Jamie was out of town on Friday night; I was thrilled that my parents were back from Florida so that I could watch the interview with them.  My mom made a yummy dinner and although their lake place isn't where I grew up, it really does feel like home.  My dad recorded the 6:00 news and a friend tipped me off that one of the promotional pieces played then, we found it and watched it several times. It was surreal.  All of this is surreal!  In the piece, I was talking about how difficult our third miscarriage was, but how we received so much support.  It was true, and it seemed like the perfect 5 second clip to describe our journey.

We all piled on the couch and I did one of the things I do best, I fell asleep.  My parents woke me up just before the 10 o'clock news was about to start. I missed the popcorn party.  I started recording Griffin watching it, then put down my camera and soaked it all up.  I knew that lots of our friends and family were huddled around their TVs watching and supporting us.  I got choked up watching it, it was truly beautiful.  They did an amazing job of telling our story in a heartfelt, genuine way.  I couldn't have asked for anything better. It was longer than I expected and better than I expected. And, I have high expectations.  My parents were great people to watch it with--they were so positive and were happy with how the story was told.  Griffin turned to me ans asked, "Is that really what happened?" I am sure he was wondering where the rest of it was, the parts that were edited out.

Texts were coming through my phone like crazy, my phone quickly filled up and I couldn't get any more texts.  Jamie called. He was happy with the story, too.  He talked to Griffin. Griffin told him that he was on TV, too!

Here were some of the text messages that came in:

I am crying and can't stop.  It was great. Love you.

Great story on WCCO!

A and H are tracking how fast the likes go up on your adoption page!  :)

What an awesome story we just watched!  So proud of you guys for doing that.  Blessings and prayers to you!

It was an awesome story.....had tears with you!

What a great story! Griffin did such a great job, too!

Great piece on WCCO!

Just saw the news.  Makes me happy and sad.  Hope you get a good response!

That was beautiful!  I am bawling with a great big smile!:)  It hurts all over again, but there is so much hope!

We saw it!  It was great!

Loved it!  <3

Here's our little man watching himself on TV:

The Adoptive Family Network

The other day we got a new "like" on our Facebook Page: https://www.facebook.com/#!/ThompsonFamilyAdoption.  I don't know her personally, but I knew exactly who she is.  She was in the waiting families book and recently was placed with a baby.  Do I sound like a crazy woman?  Probably.  Anyway, she has a unique name and their profile struck a chord with me because they also have a biological son.  They've suffered devastating losses, it truly broke my heart when I read their profile.  I noticed when they moved to the "congratulations" section of the list and was so happy for them!  In fact, I think I may have referenced it on this blog.

She read the article about us in the Fargo/Moorhead newspaper and wanted to reach out to us.  Amazing.

Over the past two weeks Jamie and I have been in contact with many adoptive families, their stories are all so different, but all have shared a similar ending: IT WAS WORTH IT!

When we had our miscarriages I felt like I was initiated into a club that I never wanted to join.  Now I feel like I've been blessed to join a new club, one with hope, possibilities, understanding and support.  It's like a group of kindred spirits.  Good stuff.

Intensity and Momentum

Since "launching" our Facebook page there has been a different level of intensity and momentum related to our adoption journey.  The quiet waiting period seems to be long gone, and my emotions are heightened.  The funny thing is that I'm not jumping at the phone to ring, but rather I'm contemplating ways to better share our story.  I want to keep the momentum for the Facebook page going, yet I don't want to bombard people with requests to like or share our page.  The potential for a TV interview is on my brain, which is an AMAZING opportunity, but I'm not going to lie, it's overwhelming, too.  Promoting ourselves just seems weird.  Uncomfortable, unnatural and humbling.  I'd really love for all of this to be easier, to be normal, to not have to work so hard for so many years to have a baby.

In the end I need to remember that the more people that know our story, the better our chances of a match.

In the past week and a half, I've had some interactions that have helped me to accept and embrace our outreach efforts.  I'm doing my best to tell myself that I should enjoy this process because it's the story of bringing our next baby to our family.

As I was nervously chatting with a co-worker about our potential interview and mentioned it to a couple of other co-workers that were close by.  Their genuine excitement helped me to realize that instead of having nervous energy, I needed to focus on positive energy.

After a shopping date at Target with my boys, I ran to the mall to pick up one more thing.  I ended up spending more time there than I expected (what a surprise!) and as I was walking out, walking in was a friend who has both a biological and adopted son.  We never run into each other except when we plan lunch dates.  It was so good to catch up with her and share our recent updates.  Watching her boys together was so, so, so inspiring.  She told me as they were walking in, the youngest was holding the oldest's arm and said, "I love you brother!"  Oh, I can't wait!

I had a lunch event for work today.  I walked in and saw a friend that I used to volunteer with and don't get to see very often anymore.  She told me that she loved our adoption Facebook page and that she had no idea we were adopting.  She commented that she couldn't imagine a more loving family for a baby.  So, sweet.

Thank goodness for these types of interactions!  They keep me as focused as I can be on what's important: the support, the positive and the possibilities.

I'll keep living with the intensity and will try to keep up the momentum, because in the end, it will bring our baby home.

Outreach

Our outreach efforts have truly given us so much hope.  We're very inspired by the support we've received and are thankful to have friends and family helping us to spread the word.  I know some people have truly gone out of their comfort zone to help us share our story.

Within one week, our Facebook page received 184 likes and was shared by at least 30 people.  (https://www.facebook.com/#!/ThompsonFamilyAdoption) I wish that if you liked the post I made, it automatically liked our Facebook adoption page, too, because I noticed some people liked my post, but not our page.  Oh well!  The important thing is getting the word out!!  Our adoption website has had over 200 new hits. It's encouraging to think that more people are aware of our desire to adopt, and will hopefully mention us if they know of someone considering adoption for their child.

We've received emails and posts from other adoptive parents giving us encouragement.  The common thread: It will be worth it!

The hope we've been given through our outreach came at a time where we really needed it.  Jamie and I are so thankful, it's put a new spring in our step.  Hope is a beautiful thing.  Knowing that many are rooting for us warms our hearts.

We've had some additional excitement, too.  Some "I know someone stories" that maybe could come to fruition?  And this, too: My AMAZING sister-in-law posted our adoption Facebook page on her site (with some very sweet comments), one of Jamie's friends from Dawson saw it.  She did some additional outreach for us and the next day WCCO called to see if we'd be interested in doing a story!!  We are still working out the details, but there's a good possibility that they will come out next week to interview our family.  It's been an emotional week--in a very good way.  No matter what happens, we're thankful for the opportunity to tell our story to others...for two reasons: I hope to bring more awareness to that nasty disease called infertility as well as bring a baby to our family.  I believe that we'll find the perfect match--a birth family and child that we're meant to share our life with.

It made me nauseous, but I did it.

A few posts ago, I mentioned the story that my co-worker sent me about a family that were matched with their adopted child through Facebook.  And, I also commented about how scary that seemed to me.  I am not a private person, but I don't like attention.  I really enjoy being under the radar, sailing smoothly in my comfort zone.
I decided to get out of my comfort zone and created a Facebook adoption page.  I asked my super awesome sister-in-law Jesi (see, I am practicing, Jesi) to check it out and tell me what she thought.  She encouraged me to post it.  And, I did!  Then I posted on her Facebook page that I thought I might throw up!  Here's what I posted:

Jamie and I are the kind of people that like to remain "under the radar", but some things are worth getting out of our comfort zone for...our family is one of them. We are currently a waiting adoptive family, we're approved for domestic infant adoption. 50% of matches happen by word of mouth. We'd appreciate it if you'd help us spread the word about our desire to be parents again by liking our adoption page-Thompson Family Adoption: https://www.facebook.com/ThompsonFamilyAdoption and sharing it with your friends. We're hopeful that we can help Griffin make his dream of becoming a big brother come true. Thank you!

I sat and watched all of the likes and shares come through and tears streamed down my face. People were liking my post, sharing it with others, liking our page...it was amazing! It was so uplifting to receive support from so many people. What an amazing gift. In 2 hours we had 70 likes on our adoption Facebook page. When I woke up in the morning we had 100. Last I checked we had over 40. Amazing. People were checking out our adoption website, too. The link is: http://thompsonfamilyadopts.shutterfly.com/. Pages that had 66 hits before I posted the page had 113 hits within two hours. It's great to know that if one of those people hears about a family that is choosing adoption for their baby, they will hopefully think of us. I received emails from people I have never met encouraging us, and from people I know that didn't realize we were hoping to adopt. Am I glad I got out of my comfort zone? You bet! Tuesday night will be a memorable one for me, I'll never forget the overwhelming feeling of support, love and hope I felt as the likes, shares and messages came through. A few other things happened due to our post--we received contact from another "I know someone" situation and it appears that we'll have some additional outreach coming our way thanks to people spreading the word! Stay tuned, I think we have some exciting things in store!

Sitting on the Sidelines

I've talked a bit about this before, but something came up today that got me thinking more about it.  Through the adoption process, we've done just that, gone through the adoption process.  Jamie and I both like processes and rules....not to some crazy extreme, but in a good way (of course that's what I think!).  So following the process seems reasonable, smart, efficient and oh so comfortable.  After what we've been through I trust that something WILL work out for us.  I don't expect to ever understand why we lost so many babies, but I can understand that we've been brought to adoption for a reason.  I am thankful and grateful for the opportunity...on so many levels.

A friend, co-worker and mentor (literally) sent me this link today: http://gma.yahoo.com/video/parenting-26594265/2-kids-left-behind-at-2-different-chuck-e-cheese-s-28584304.html#crsl=%252Fvideo%252Fparenting-26594265%252Ffacebook-adoption-cuts-out-middle-man-28331225.html

It put me in the uncomfortable world of adoption outreach.  Doing more than just telling people we are a waiting family, but reaching out to people.  Maybe through social media, maybe through ads, maybe through flyers.  It makes me feel so vulnerable....being an open book to everyone seems scary to me.  What about the calls from women that are scams....leading us on to think they are pregnant, but really want money.  What about getting a "match" with someone that hasn't had any counseling, will she change her mind?  What about all of the people reading about our life that are just reading it to be nosy...GASP!  I really want to avoid drama and disappointments if we can.  We've had enough of both.

Then the same friend sent me a devotional.  The message was from 2 Corinthians 5:7 For we live by faith, not by sight.  Part of the devotional read, "If you live your life too safely, you will never know the thrill of Me working through you."

So I started thinking about getting out of my comfort zone.

On the way to pick up Griffin today I started daydreaming about adding more to our adoption website and sharing it publicly (right now it's only shared through LSS....nice and safe!  I thought about a Facebook page and You Tube video.  It all seems so time consuming, I'd rather be spending time with my boys, blogging, hanging out with friends, scrapbooking, this list could go on forever.  But, if it brings us to our baby, then it will be worth it.

So, I'm going to start pondering what outreach could look like for us, and at the same time keep praying that we get a call.  THE call.  Soon!

P.S. Jodi I loved your post about your calls.  So exciting, fun and inspirational!

Remembering the Day

"The anniversary" hung over my head a bit, but it turned out to be as good of a day as it could (of course, a call from our agency could have put it over the top, but I'll settle with good!). 

I received encouraging support from friends, including some great quotes that I'll share later.  (As a side note, I don't EXPECT friends to remember this day, so if you are reading this and didn't say anything, please don't feel even a twinge of guilt!!)

A good friend stopped into my office at about the time we were in the ultrasound room last year. I told her it was hard to think back to what I was doing exactly a year before, but from there is was "up".  The amazing support we were blessed with from others kept us going, and still does.  We haven't given up the hope that our family will grow.  I remember how Jamie and I came together, the cards, thoughtful and loving gifts, calls, texts and prayers.  I know prayers help heal, we are proof. 

Late morning these showed up in my office, with a note that said, "Remembering ALL of our loved ones. Love and God bless, Jamie":

Thank God for my amazing husband that is full of support and surprises.

I picked up our miracle from daycare, had a nice dinner with him, and went to the library for a fun preschool event.  No feelings of sadness (even when I look back and think of all the families there with multiple children), just feelings of being blessed that I GET to pick up a child from daycare and bring him to fun kid events.

Tomorrow

Tomorrow is the anniversary of us finding out that our fourth baby was no longer alive....after two beautiful, normal ultrasounds and nearly 14 weeks of carrying him.  At dinner tonight I shed a few tears thinking that a year ago I was packing up the pink and blue cookies that some of my friends helped me bake so that I could announce our pregnancy at work.  I was living a lie, but I didn't know it.  I thought my baby was alive and growing in me, but he had passed away, maybe even a week before I knew it.

And, so I will remember this: the amazing support from my co-workers, family and dear friends.  They helped to show me that I am much stronger than I thought I was. 

And, that we have each other.  One foot in front of the other, that's how we got through those first few days.  The day after my D & C we took Griffin to the Children's Museum.  It was tough, but we made the best of a bad situation. 

We're still waiting, but thankfully we still have hope.

In the photo of the care basket from my co-workers is a calendar that's on my desk at home.  On Jan. 10 the blessing reads:

"A longing fulfilled is a tree of life." Proverbs 13:12.  Griffin fulfilled my longing to be a mother, and I am sure there will be a sweet baby that will fulfill my longing to be a mother again.

The Fast Forward Button

There have been times that through our struggle to grow our family, I wished that I could press the "fast forward button" on life and get to the happy spot where we had more children, the family photo where I didn't always feel like we were missing someone. 

I met an adoptive mother today and saw her "fast forward", and it was so great to see.  Her family that grew through adoption. 

She also taught me all about cloth diapers.  It was so sweet of her to open her home and have her kids share their toys with Griffin.  I genuinely wanted to know all about cloth diapers, but found myself drifting off into adoption talk.  It was nice to be with someone who has been through it, twice!

I hear reoccurring comments when I talk to adoptive parents.  1) Every story and situation is different.  2) I always hear that the children that were adopted into their family "made sense" or it was "meant to be" or it was "a perfect fit".  3) I also hear about the extended families that are developed because of open adoption.  It's so good to hear.  I feel blessed to have this opportunity, even though some days it seems so scary....there is so much unknown.  Good thing I have a whole lot of love for flying by the seat of my pants.

I'm savin' up for a little baby!

The other day I was shopping with a great friend and she said, "Did you see this!?" and showed me the cutest little "piggy" bank.  It's PERFECT for us!  The other day at work it showed up on my desk, it gave me a good chuckle.  I went to move it and it had change in it.  I went into her office to tell her thank you (it truly made my day) and she told me the story behind the money inside the bank.

Her 5 year-old daughter saw the bank and asked her what it was for.  She explained that Jamie and I were adopting a baby and that adopting costs lots of money.  Her daughter left the room and came back with her piggy bank.  She told her mom that she didn't have any dollars, but she did have lots of quarters.  So, our new "baby bank" is the recipient of her quarters.  Isn't that the sweetest thing?  It completely warmed my heart.  The next time I saw my friend's daughter I gave her a big hug.  I can't wait for the day she can help me feed our new little baby.  What a sweet, thoughtful, generous girl!



 Hilarious.....

RESOLVE Conference

Last winter Jamie and I attended a RESOLVE conference in the Twin Cities.  It was in March, so after our 3rd miscarriage when we were struggling to determine what we should do next.  We filled out the initial one-page document to apply for adoption through LSS, but had so many questions.  I didn't feel like I could go through with the last round of IVF first, but the road to adoption seemed equally as never wracking.  So much unknown. 

The RESOLVE conference was a major turning point for us, you can read about that here.  I am extremely grateful for the conference and the volunteers that gave their time to make it happen.  At the conference, I completed a form that indicated that I would like to volunteer for the conference in 2012. 

Yesterday I got an email asking if I'd be willing to volunteer for the upcoming conference and outlining some options.  I'm excited!  I hope that many others experience the comfort, support and information we received when we attended. 

Sigh of Relief!

A huge weight was lifted off me as I attached our adoption profile to an email and sent it off to be printed.  Then, I emailed everything for our web listing to LSS. I honestly felt giddy and started to well up with tears of joy.  Soon we will have a chance at being picked to parent once again.  What a blessing!  I KNOW it will be a hard road.  I KNOW we have a lot to learn, and will continually be learning.  But, I also KNOW that we have lots and lots of unconditional love to give a child and we can't wait to share it.  I'm thrilled that we have this opportunity and that Jamie and I are on the same page and both knew our family wasn't complete yet.  I'm thrilled that we have so many people supporting us.  Any negativity we hear about our desire to adopt doesn't come from our core group. 

Many people proofed our profile, it was great to get the input of our friends, family and expert proofers!  So many great points and ideas were brought up which helped to make our profile better.  The thing I really love about it is that it's so US. The real deal. 

Many uplifting things happened this week that encourage our hope and I'll share those later.  It seemed like every time I turned around I was encouraged by a hope filled story or a "sign".  Love that!

Follow Up to My Facebook Rant

The other day I was ranting about Facebook and this little game about posting X weeks and what you are craving, even though you aren't pregnant.  In my world, pregnancy is not something to laugh about.  Not even a little.  My sister-in-law put the BEST post on her FB wall and I just had to share it here.  (I hope that's OK, Jesi!)

The link she posted:

Feel Your Boobies - Are you doing it? A friendly reminder when you least expect it.

feelyourboobies.com Jesi's comments: I think breast cancer awareness posts are great. It never hurts to get the word out there. I didn't post the purse game...mostly because I didn't think my grandpa or mother-in-law would appreciate the humor ;) And I didn't post the pregnancy one because, knowing my history, the second I wrote that I'm sure I'd actually be preggers! But mostly because I thought of someone I love that would do anything to be able to post that on her wall ♥ So...here is my breast cancer awareness post.

How great is that!?!?!

Then she posted a link to this blog.  http://www.hannahweptsarahlaughed.com/2011/09/im-0-weeks-and-craving-a-baby/  Wow.  I kinda wish I had the guts to post on FB that, "I'm 0 weeks and craving a baby."  But, I'm too afraid I'll sound like some weepy-poor-me infertile woman that can't let go of our unfortunate circumstances.  Someday I'll get some more guts.  In the mean time, I'll let my sister-in-law stick up for us infertiles! 

Garage Sale Round 3

Garage sale round #1 landed us a little over $1,200!  The leftover items were being stored at a friend's house and her son recently had a sale and set some of our items out, so we made another $230!  Now we are prepping for another (final?) sale at another friend's home.  They have a big neighborhood sale on Saturday, so we decided to take advantage of it.  We've had a lot of items donated (thank you to you!), including lots and lots of kids clothes (which sell well)!!  Barb and I priced quite a bit on Saturday night after a long day on the water.  Tonight Jen and Barb came over and we finished it up--a bad storm rolled through so we had to drag some of it in the basement to price for a bit.  The good news is that we found more for the sale while we were down there!
Here are some of the goodies we have to sell:

It's a ton of work to get everything together, but it's been fun spending time with friends to do so!  Thank goodness I have people willing to help!!  And, the sale part is fun--I love seeing what sells and who buys what. 
Of course, a garage sale isn't going to come close to funding a $22,000 adoption.  Have no fear, we have been saving and know that we'll somehow be able to make it work.  Part of having the sale is about raising awareness that we are adopting.  If we are connected to our birth mother privately, things may proceed faster and we will save $5,000 of the expenses through Lutheran Social Services.  It's been fun educating people about the adoption process, and it has been really uplifting for me to get support from so many people.  This process has been tough and the support of others has given us so much strength.  Just yesterday Jamie said, "Heather, if you look back over the past year and think about it, it's just a nightmare." Yep, that's why we do our best to work through the challenges one by one....when you combine them together it seems so hard to conquer. 
We're doing what we can today to make progress--prepping for a garage sale that will get us financially closer to covering our $22,000 in adoption costs!

Dealing

And, like clockwork, by coping mechanisms kick in. I started organizing things downstairs, cleaning up and straightening up. My way of putting a little control in an out of control day. Now I am downloading photos. So, I'll be updating our family blog, because that makes me happy. Then I can see the good in life, our blessings. Here are some of them:

G-man enjoying a "bite" of cotton candy at the Como Zoo.

My dear Wednesday Night Girls.
My boys riding on the Schlegel's motocross track, in their front yard!!
Griffin watching the high jump at the State Track Meet.
My good friend and encourager, Jenny, at the Como Zoo with our friend, the gorilla.

Fun stuff in the last week. Grieving, but living all at the same time.

One Day at a Time, One Foot in Front of the Other

The day started rainy and gloomy. I felt rainy and gloomy. Why oh why or why do we have to keep going through this? It's so hard to make sense out of it. I can't make sense out of it.

I spent the morning shopping for flowers with my mom. Jamie knows that being productive is one of the ways I cope with our infertility struggles and our devastating losses, and he has warmly embraced that philosophy, too. So, up went our new flower boxes. (Thanks, Stacy, for the idea!)



Then, we had a surprise lakeside visit from my dad in their new pontoon we didn't know anything about!



My parents brought over dinner. My mom planted with me. My dad helped to entertain Griffin and Jamie mowed the lawn.

I felt less gloomy and saw this:

Just the sign I needed to see, that everything would be ok. It wasn't going to be easy, but it was going to be ok.